Fayetteville, WV Trip 2008


The gang hit 77 and headed to Fayetteville, WV for Alligator Jackson's Second Annual Whitewater Rafting Trip. But, this year, there was a twist. We didn't go rafting. Just drinking.

There wasn't any cold Crocweiser available but ol' AJ was quite content with some ice cold Bud Light. The rest of the gang was too. Well, Mitch had New Castle and Killians at the bar and Jason was downing some energy drink with alcohol. Alligator Jackson warned him that he would get sick trying to drink cute organge crap while surrounded by big dogs (and a gator) drinking beer. Jason didn't listen and yeah, he got sick. He also got beat in pool by Dave, twisted knee (though no one knows quite how) and almost came up missing. Well, he was missing in our drunk lines of vision. As we were imaging him wondering off into the woods resulting in a 2008 remake of Deliverence or becoming bear food, he was actually laying down on a picnin table outside the bar.

We stayed at Rivers Expeditions in Fayetteville, WV. We HIGHLY recommend it and the accompanying bar- Red Dog Saloon. Great cabins and a beautiful campsite. The bar rawked. Hey, it has it all: 2 big chested bartenders, a cool beatnik band complete with bongos (Option 22, featuring the very talented singer, Lorie), ice cold beer, and a big cock out front. Well, to clarify it, it was a statue of a giant rooster. I haven't quite figured out why it is there but if I can hang out with a walking, talking giant alligator, then hey, they can have a statue of a rooster out front.

Everyone in the bar loved Alligator Jackson but this one girl must of been drunk because she came ip and said, "Why?" I asked her what she meant by that. She wanted to know why I had a stuffed alligator on my shoulder. Well, if she couldn't see that it was a realwalking, talking beer drinking, singing, geetar playin' alligator standing by my side....then she must have been DRUNK.

Repo Man put on a spectacular dancin' show. Mitch captured it on video and we were all set to put it on youtube to share it with the masses but the next day. Repo Man said "You're gonna put that on youtube and my kids will see it and have a cow>" So We felt guilty and AJ suggested that we shouldn't put it up, so we didn't.

We partied for hours. Shawn and Butterbean went rafting the next day. It took Butterbean about an hour to get Shawn awake. I think the Crown got the best of Shawn. Butterbean slept on the truck or passed out, I'm not sure which. He fell out of the boat the next day which didn't surprise Jason because Jason said he fell out of the truck, too that night.

I can't say enough about Fayetteville. Words can't describe the beauty. It's something to see and it felt great being outdoors. Check out my pictures on myspace at www.myspace.com/alligatorjackson We got up the next morning and checked out the siters. We had a great breakfast at Shoney's, but we forgot to wake Jason. Honest mistake, Jason, we share. You missed a great breakfast and it was even free because Dave bought.

Then we did some walking at the New River Bridge visitor center. You have to check it out. There's a viewing area that puts you close to the bridge. Dave took the great pics on my page. I bought a couple of 16x20 at the gift shop that truly rawk!

It was a great trip that I strongly reccommend taking and definitely check out Rivers and Red Dog. The hippie doorman at the Dog is also a tour guide. He's multitalented because he runs the Red Dog Saloon myspace page as well. Last year, he was riding around the bar on rollerskates He's quite a character. Great weekend. Chomp On!!!!!

Hey swamp bros both near and far. The band Hydrogyn is exploding as they release Deadly Passions in the US this week. on 6/10 and worldwide on 6/23. This is an excellent cd and as great as Bombshell was this is much better. Very loud and aggressive with thrash tunes like Rejection, an arena rock version Of You Oughta Know, and a killer heartfelt ballad in shadow. The tiltle track is an arena rock stomper. Plenty of balls out rockers and scraming geetars on this one.




Plus for those of you locally in thwe WV/OH/KY area.





Hosted By: Gary & Sonya Newman
When: Thursday Jun 19, 2008
at 8:00 PM
Where: Paramount Arts Center
1300 Winchester Ave
Ashland, KY 41101
United States

If you contact Gary and Sonya on my friends list you can purchase special VIP packages which for 30 allows you to meet and greet the band, a copy of the cd and a poster, some refreshments and a ticket in the first 3 rows. This is a hot concert where tickets can be purchased for 10. Plus you get Gyspy roze and Larry Pancake. This is the first rocket concert at the Paramiunt in a looooong while so let's help this experiemnt succeed. Paramount is where Billy Ray recorded his Achy Braky video.. Plus, the ol' gator will be in the VIP section as I just purchased a ticket.



I'll be the one with the cold croceweiser!!! CHOMP ON!!!!

Here's an article from 6/8/08 Herald-dispatch:

Local rock band ready to unleash its second album, 'Deadly Passions,' this week
Jun 07, 2008 @ 10:35 PM
By DAVE LAVENDER
The Herald-Dispatch
HUNTINGTON -- In the musical lab all winter, Hydrogyn has stirred in all the elements and just the right energy for a full-scale, girl-powered, global metal explosion.



That's the plan.



Holed up all winter at Huntington's Smash Hits Studio, the locally-based and globe-trotting rock band, Hydrogyn is set to unleash its second CD, "Deadly Passions" Tuesday, June 10, in the United States and June 23, in the rest of the world.



Out on the UK-based label DR2, an imprint of Demolition Records, the band is excited about the summer release that was produced by guitarist and band founder, Jeff Westlake.



Westlake, who started the band in 2003 with Julie Westlake and fellow veteran guitarist Jeff Boggs, said they're anxious to get the CD out for people to hear the band's own home-grown blend of female-belted heavy metal, and thankful for the support of a good-sized label.



"We're real excited because it's being able to take what we've done and put a big money player behind it," Westlake said of hooking up with Demolition Records. "Of course, they are a big label. They have made their living for their entire career off of classics bands like WASP, Twisted Sister and Quiet Riot. They decided they wanted to get more modern and get to the here and now, so they signed us and signed a band out of the UK, called MacQueen, which is a great band, and they signed Steve Harris, out of Iron Maiden, his daughter, Lauren Harris.

"

Westlake said the label was first in contact with them in September 2007 when Hydrogyn was playing a gig in Seattle.



"We went out there and basically had a showcase but didn't know it," he said. "Before we left Seattle we were called by the label so we came straight home, threw the dirty clothes in the hamper, grabbed some clean ones and eight hours later we were on our way to New York City.

"

For its first CD, "Bombshell," the band had hooked up with Nashville-based metal master Michael Wagener (Metallica, Motley Crue, Megadeth, Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper) at his WireWorld Studios outside Nashville, and at some pre-production at Thunder Bay Studios in Ashland.



When Wagener wasn't available for this CD, Jeff decided to bring it all home.



With Julie writing lots of new originals, and Jeff producing, the band began building the new CD with Steve Riley at Smash Hits Studio in Huntington and the boys in the band, Jeff (guitars), Chris Sammons on bass and Josh Kitchen on drums.



In addition to being convenient, Jeff said Riley got a smashing sound out of the band.



"Steve does fantastic work out there," Jeff said. "The album is really big, the guitars are big, the drums are big, of course, the vocals are big, the bass guitar is phat, it really is the way we wanted it to sound. Before we ever got into the studio, we did a lot of pre-planning, and it helped out a lot. When it came time to mix the album, it was mixed right in your face -- no big room reverb, I wanted it to be right here.

"

Julie Westlake said the first CD crash course of working with a legend in Nashville really empowered her to hone her songs and craft -- something she feels has really paid off with this CD.



"Being able to work with Michael made my writing ability improve so much in learning how to structure songs properly and how to build songs to make them more energetic," she said.



Working over the past few years with Wagener for half a dozen recording workshops was also invaluable in learning first hand about getting a great sound, Jeff Westlake said.



"We basically got a life's worth of lessons in the three years of working with Michael," he said. "He is such a good person and we're thankful to him. When he wasn't available the band talked about it and they all said they wanted me to do it. So I'm now the guy in the band writing songs and producing the album. So if the album is bad, I'm going to get it twice as hard.

"

Westlake should be safe from a band beating as the CD walks that razor-thin line between being heavy enough for the wallet chain-carrying crowd and melodic enough for radio.



"I think Jeff loves the heavy guitars and I think musically that is why we have the heaviness to it," Julie Westlake said. "But we also have the very melodic parts of the music. I never grew up listening to rock or metal. It was always country for me, so for me it's not anything else but melody that draws me in to write the lyrics.

"

Jeff Westlake said the CD has a bit of a different style than "Bombshell," as the CD has a more metal yell to make it less pop sounding.



"It's a lot heavier, the songs are a lot different, almost a different style," Julie Westlake said. "I think 'Bombshell' tended to be a bit more on the pop side of things. This is a little more aggressive.

"

"When we say heavy we're not talking like Cannibal Corpse heavy," Jeff Westlake said, laughing. "It is still really heavy -- the music is heavy, but what I really like about the album is that it is hooky from start to finish. The song that leads off the album, 'Rejection' was strictly written for our European fans. You've got double bass being played at 75 beats per minute -- that's just the kind of thing they like. Then we end the album with a very beautiful piano-based song. In between, there is something for everybody.

"

What Jeff Westlake also likes is that the CD really sounds like the band's ever-maturing musical vision -- lots of crunchy guitar, lots of great melodies and singing and even layered at times with a rarely-heard metal instrument -- the Hammond B3 organ.



"I think Julie said it best that we made the album we really wanted to make this time," he said. "It's modern sounding. There's a Hammond B3 organ all wet, nasty and sloppy on there and it blends so well. We got it all mixed, and it sounds really good, some screaming and some baby grand working on the album. We got all that different stuff working yet it sounds fresh, and modern, and us.

"


Just push play: A closer look at Hydrogyn
Jun 07, 2008 @ 10:35 PM
The Herald-Dispatch
Here's a closer look at the locally-based internationally-signed band, Hydrogyn.



ON THE WEB: Check out a few of the cuts from "Deadly Passions" online at www. hydrogyn. com and www. myspace. com/hydrogyn.



THE CD: The band's 11-song CD features the original songs "Rejection," "On and On," "Your Life," "Deadly Passion," "You Oughta Know," "Over U," "Candles Light Your Face," "Seroquil," "Silent Animation," "Shadow," and the bonus track ("I Know").



THE BAND: Lead vocals, Julie Westlake; guitars, Jeff Westlake; bass, Chris Sammons; drums, Josh Kitchen; crew, Live Sound: Dave " The Davo" Chandler.



SEE THEM LIVE: Hydrogyn will be playing live at the Paramount Arts Center at 8 p.m. Thursday, June 19. Southern rockers, Gypzy Rose and Larry Pancake will also be on the bill. Tickets are $10.
Go online at www. paramountartscenter. com or call 606-324-3175.



FAN CLUB PARTY: Get a pre-show meet and greet, tickets to the show (first three rows), a copy of the new CD, and refreshments for $30.
Get Fan Club tickets by contacting the band at www. hydrogyn. com and www. myspace. com/hydrogyn.



IN THE STORES: The new CD comes out June 10, in the United States and June 23, in Europe.



DID YOU KNOW? Hydrogyn is now labelmates on Demolition Records with such acts as David Lee Roth, Quiet Riot, Twisted Sister, W.A.S.P., Vixen and other metal acts.



OTHER TRI-STATE ROCK: The Tri-State may be all about the Country Music Highway, but several local native rock acts are out making a joyful noise across the country. Mason County-based metal act, Bobaflex released its sophomore TVT Records release, "Tales From Dirt Town," last year and just played the Rock on the Range concert in Columbus in May. The band plays Fluid in Huntington on July 23, with Dope and others.



Tri-State native Christian rock act, Our Hearts Hero dropped its first CD produced on Gotee Records on Sept. 18, 2007 and then hit the Punk The Halls tour to end the year. Compared to Switchfoot and Jimmy Eat World, Our Hearts Hero plays the main stage at Icthus Festival, at 3 p.m. June 12, at Wilmore, Ky., and a plays a 7 p.m.
June 14, gig at the Live The Difference event at the Point Pleasant Riverfront in Point Pleasant, W. Va.



A brief history of Hydrogyn
Jun 07, 2008 @ 10:40 PM
The Herald-Dispatch
Here's a look at the rock history of the band Hydrogyn

2003 -- Veteran Tri-State guitarists Jeff Westlake and Jeff Boggs teamed up to form a new band Hydrogyn in September 2003. Country vocalist Julie Westlake joins the band as the lead vocalist.



2004 -- Hydrogyn gets an endorsement with Pepsi, and releases a full-length album called "Best Served with Volume." The band also shoots videos for two of its songs, "The Sands" and "Breaking Me Down.

"

2004 -- The band records a single called "Vesper's Song" to accompany Tony C. Caputo's graphic novel "VESPERS." The book tells the story of a super-powered rock starlet who starts a 12-step group for fellow superheroes. The song will be featured on a soundtrack to be included with the next printing of "VESPERS.

"

2005 -- Julie and the band is featured on ElectricBasement. com, one of the most popular metal sites, in her own section called "Julie's Jolts.

"

2005 -- Pepsi, who not only sponsored the fledgling outfit but hoisted them in front of tens of thousands strong at NASCAR (Chevy Rocking 400 in May 2005).



2005 -- The band catches the ear of Nashville-based metal master Michael Wagener (Metallica, Motley Crue, Megadeth, Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper) and comes to Ashland's Thunder Bay Studio in July for pre-production work with the band on its CD, "Bombshell.

"

2005 -- The band records and spends time with Wagener's Double Trouble Productions and his WireWorld Studio to record their CD, and to help Wagener during his recording workshops.



2005 -- Hydrogyn is featured on X-Fest's Loud and Local stage on Sept. 17, at Harris Riverfront Park.



2006 -- Hydrogyn released "Bombshell," on Chavis Records/DA Records on Sept. 27, 2006 and by the winter had sold more than 8,000 copies in Europe.



2006 -- Lead singer Julie Westlake hits the cover of several European music magazines, including Fireworks, Strutter and Flash.



2006 -- "Bombshell," dropped onto three of the Billboard charts at No. 3 on the Top Heatseekers Chart (Northeast); No. 19 on the Top Internet Albums Chart; and No. 46 on the Top Heatseekers Chart.



2007 -- Hydrogyn goes to Europe for a couple tours, including a November stint of 15 dates in 19 days that included sold-out shows in Italy.



2007 -- The band begins recording a new CD with Jeff Westlake producing and with engineer Steve Riley at Smash Hits Studio in Huntington.



2008 -- The band signs on with the UK-based label DR2, an imprint of Demolition Records for a three CD deal. The first CD, "Deadly Passions," will come out June 10 in the United States and June 23 worldwide.

Ahhhhhh, the temp os finally near 100 in da Swamp and Mike's Hard Lemonade is tasting damn good.  The first few anyway, then ya get bloated and have to switch to Crocweiser!  Anyway, them hot summer girls are looking mighty fan decked out in nice bikinis and hot tans.  The only thing goin' wrong is them noisy locusts or cicatas or whatever they're called this year.  Just gotta crank the cd player a lil' louder to drown them out.  I've been crankin' the new Hydrogyn cd Deadly Passion at www.hydrogyn.com.
Summer rock is back this year.  What I mean by Summer rock is the old hair metal anthems that ya put the top down and cruise to.  It's almost like we're back in the 80's with brand new cds by Whitesnake, Dokken, Def Leppard, and Journey and one coming by Motley Crue.  All of these are excellent returns to form.  Journey has a two cd set, one with new material and one with classics rerecorded with their new singer that does a great job.
The Journey cd Revelations is only available at Wal-Mart who also released the Eagle cd earlier.  So Wal-Mart is the world's biggest cd store so now it looks like it may want to be the biggest label as well.
Baseball is goin' strong and keep yer eyes on Jay Bruce of the Reds.  He's an exciting 21 year old who is doing great things already.  The Reds are struggling to play 500 but they have some young whippersnappers like Bruce, Joey Votto, and some young arms like Jonny Cueto so maybe in a couple of years the Big Red Machine will roll again.

www.allsouthernrock.com keeps adding great new southern rock bands like Buster Chopz, Swamp, a Boy Named Sioux, Hogjaw, and many others.  Plus, they have new material by Gary Jeffries and SwampdeWamp as well as playing classic Skynyrd, Blackfoot, Molly Hatchet and others so as the south continues to march on, check 'em all out!
Well, not much to say, but "I'll have 'nuther cold one".  Been a while since my last blog and just wanna say 'ello!  Chomp on my scaly swamp bruthas!!!!

Ahhhhhh farts that don't stink....what a concept.  These are sweet farts.  Well, there isn't an odor but they are sweet because you know you hit the sweet spot.  It's just like in baseball when you swing the bat and here the crack.  You can tell you got good wood by the sound.  That's what a pussy fart does.  When I hear a pussy fart....I know I just hit good wood, made great contact.  Some people call them queefs but that's just trying to dress something up.  They're pussy farts.  And it's great when a girl does it for the first time.  They get all embarrassed and turn red.  They think it's a smell or a bad thing.  But I know I did my job.  It's like the pussy is thanking me.  It's like it's saying "Gator, thanks for the effort.  You pounded me good, buddy, GREAT JOB!
I hear that and while the girl is blushing, I'm jumping up and doing a touchdown dance.  Old pros know that sound.  They just laugh and say "wanna try and make that noise again?"
She can fake an orgasm.  She can fake scream and moan, but she can't fake a pussy fart.  She can't lie about it.  She can't see your obvious joy and say "It wasn't that good, I've had better."  When the pussy yells, it's been hit good.  It's crying out in joy.  It's saying, "You win AJ, I've had enough!  Good job you beast you!"
AJ's best advice for making pussy farts is to just bend them over and let out that animal instinct.  That ol' Scorpions song "Steam Rock Fever" comes to my mind.  I just take a deep breath and do my best sledgehammer imitation.  And just like when a baseball bat collides with a 90 mile an hour fast ball.  That loud pop ensues and I just know without looking that it is out of the ball park.  CHOMP ON!!!!

Aw right chompers and chompettes!!

The 2008 election is right around da corner. This is the most diverse group of candidates ever! Among the major candidates are a woman, an African American, a Mormon, an actor, a plagirist, and the usual assortment of liars and scammers. So...........I got me a case of Crocweiser and went through the constitution and there ain't nothin' that says about another spieces runnin! So let's add to the diversity. I may be an alligator but I'm an American alligator!! Ol' AJ can drink a case of Croc and out president any of these wannabe's!! Obama may have Oprah but I got a whole swampful of characters to help me out!

THE GREEN CANDIDATE: Yeah, all that talk about GREEN. Ain't nobody greener than ol' AJ except maybe Kermit The Frog and maybe he can be my VP! I've got the perfect solution to global warming! My plan is called OPERATION BEER CRUST!!! Ya see, AJ gets overheated lying in Da Swamp all day so I know how ol' Planet Earth feels. What we gotta do is build big ice houses and get beer at the perfect temperature. Ya know, right at that point right before it becomes ice. There's not ice in the beer but just a cold crust. That does the trick for ol' AJ everytime. A few of those and the planet will be cooler. It's an exact science, it takes years of practicing to get beer at the perfect beer crust stage.
Now, ol' Al Gore was close with his benefit concerts but it didn't make alot of sense flying all them musicans around using up all that fuel. There should be a series of concerts set up but local indie bands can fill the bill. They will get lots of exposure and the concerts can take place throughout the country at the same time and not use up all that fuel!

MILITARY: Iraq is on everyone's mind. Hey, let the military run the war. The President is Commander in Chief but what do they know about the military. Granted Hiliary may know about hand to hand combat when she bitchslapped Bill around all those times she caught him cheatin', but if AJ is President he will trust his staff to take care of business. One thing AJ will do is making running down our troops hate speech and make it a hate crime. It's all right to disagree with the war, but leave our brave men and women out of it! AJ backs our soldiers 110 percent. They're out bustin' their ass for us everyday so we can drink whatever brand of beer we crave. God bless our troops!

QUOTES: Well, if yer gonna be President, ya gotta have quotes! With apologies to the great Presidents of the past in paranthesis. Here's AJ spin on some famous Presidential quotes! Recycled by AJ and ready to use in my campaign!

"You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't steal a cold beer from a thirsty alligator." (Abraham Lincoln)

"Beer goggles cause errors of judgment, not of intent." (Ulysses Grant)


"Beer, when it begins to take root, is a plant of rapid drunkeness." (George Washington)

"One man with liquid courage is a majority." (Thomas Jefferson)

"Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my dinner?" (Abraham Lincoln)

"Good ballplayers make good citizens unless they play for the Cincinnati Bengals." (Chester Arthur)

"Speak softly and have a sharp set of teeth." (Theodore Roosevelt)

"The only man who makes no mistake is the man who does not buy enough beer at last call." (Theodore Roosevelt)

"The only thing we have to fear is running out of beer." (Franklin Roosevelt)

"Mr. Gorbachev, pour me another shot." (Ronald Reagan)

"I did not have sexual relations with that croccodile."





And here are some actual Bush quotes from http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/blbushisms.htm: (Ol' AJ didn't have to do a thing to make these funny!)



"The decisions we make in Washington have a direct impact on the people in our country, obviously." --George W. Bush, New Albany, Ind., Nov. 13, 2007

"I don't particularly like it when people put words in my mouth, either, by the way, unless I say it." --George W. Bush, Crawford, Texas, Nov. 10, 2007

"In other words, he was given an option: Are you with us or are you not with us? And he made a clear decision to be with us, and he's acted on that advice." --George W. Bush, on President Pervez Musharraf, Crawford, Texas, Nov. 10, 2007

"We're going to -- we'll be sending a person on the ground there pretty soon to help implement the malaria initiative, and that initiative will mean spreading nets and insecticides throughout the country so that we can see a reduction in death of young children that -- a death that we can cure." --George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Oct. 18, 2007

"All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone." --George W. Bush, San Diego, Calif., Oct. 25, 2007

"My hearts are with the Jeffcoats right now, that's what I'm thinking." --George W. Bush, after meeting with California wildfire victims Kendra and Jay Jeffcoat, San Diego, Calif., Oct. 25, 2007

"I fully understand those who say you can't win this thing militarily. That's exactly what the United States military says, that you can't win this military." --George W. Bush, on the need for political progress in Iraq, Washington, D.C., Oct. 17, 2007

"My job is a decision-making job, and as a result, I make a lot of decisions." --George W. Bush, The Decider, Lancaster, Pa., Oct. 3, 2007

"I got a lot of Ph.D.-types and smart people around me who come into the Oval Office and say, 'Mr. President, here's what's on my mind.' And I listen carefully to their advice. But having gathered the device, I decide, you know, I say, 'This is what we're going to do.'" --George W. Bush, Lancaster, Pa., Oct. 3, 2007






CHOMP ON EVERYONE!!!!

      "Motherchomp, this beer is HOT" Alligator Jackson bellowed, looking menacingly at TJ Dawg.

     Just then, water sprayed everywhere as a huge croccodile burst through the swamp surface looking quite excited.

     "It's CroccodAl Gore!" TJ shouted surprised.

     "It's a crisis!" CroccoadAl blurted with a sense of urgency.  "I told everyone.  It's global warming.  I warned everyone.  It's turning all the beer in the world hot!"

     "I think TJ just forgot to ice it" Alligator Jackson said giving TJ dirty looks.

     "It's man!  He's destroying the planet!  He's destroying the planet!  I warned everyone, I warned everyone!" CroccoadAl paniced.

    "The sky is fallin', the sky is fallin'!" TJ mocked.

     "We have to fix this or it will be too late, all the beer in the world will go hot!"

     "Wooooo, wait a minute.  Did you say all beer will be hot?"  AJ began to be concerned.

     "I was just at Da Swamp.  All the beer at da Swamp is hot too!  We're too late,"  CroccodAl was hysterical.

     "TJ, did you hotstock the beer again at Da Swamp.? I told you about puttin' the hot beer on top." AJ was clearly agitated with the lil' doggie.

     "We must spread awareness of global warming or there won't be any cold beer to drink,"  Gore continued to rant.  "Maybe I should run for President of the Swamp to raise social awareness?"

     "Maybe ya should just run down to the liquor store and get me some cold beer?" AJ looked at TJ and they both laughed.

     "You better heed my warning.  The time to act is now or there soon won't be any ice to put on your beloved Crocweiser."

     "Yer talking crazy but yer scarin' me.  Is there really any chance that all the beer in the world will turn hot?"  AJ wondered.

     "All the ice is melting at the Ice Cap.  All the beer is hot there too?"

     AJ looked at TJ.  "Don't look at me," TJ said, "I didn't stock the beer at the Ice Cap."

     "We're runnin' out of time, soon there won't be any cold beer!  We must do somethin'"  Gore continued to rave about nothing.

     "I just don't like hot beer," TJ whined.  "It's hard on my stomach.  It gets all hot and fizzy and sloshes around in my tummy.  What are we gonna do, AJ?"

     "I think this feller's been out in the sun too long.  But he is talking beer and beer is serious bizness.  Can we risk having to drink hot beer?" AJ pondered.

     "I know, we'll put on a concert!  A big swamp concert!  Everyone will love it and then I'll be elected Pres....." CroccodAL though aloud.

     "A concert for cold beer!" TJ gasped, smiling at the idea.

     Gore looked at AJ.  "Will you play so I can be Pres.....I mean, so we can keep all the beer in the world from turning hot?"

     "Hmmmmm.  I've played for cold beer never actually for cold beer.   If it is to save cold beer.  Count me in....er...by the way, will there be any cold beer there?"  AJ asked.

     "If we hurry, if we hurry.  The beer is turning hot as we speak.  We must hurry before it is too late.  The election is soon, we don't have much time."

     "Election?" TJ questioned.

     "What election."  Gore covered.  "I mean, erection.  I got an erection at the thought of solving the global warming crisis and saving cold beer. We will find all of the big acts from all of the swamps all over the world and fly them in."

     "Isn't that the sort of thing we are trying to conserve on.  I mean isn't it wasting energy in the name of saving energy?"  TJ wondered.

     "I just think that if TJ Dawg quits being lazy and stocks the beer the way it's suppossed to be stocked, then the problem will be solved?"  AJ growled.

     "But how will that make me President?"  Gore boomed.

     Gore, your a croc all right.  A croc of shit.  The only crisis around here involves lazy dogs stocking the beer.  I think if I take a chomp out of a certain doggie's ass that will solve the only real crisis around.  Besides the crisis of you running around trying to scare anyone.  So why don't you save the cold beer, Gore, by helping TJ stock the beer the way it's suppossed to be!  Before I chomp both of you.  By the way, the concert still on but instead of playing to save the cold beer, I'll play and you will give me cold beer!!!!!  Chomp On!!!"

     

     

    

James Michael Murphy is a legend in the Huntington, WV / Ashland, Ky tri-state area.  Sadly, the legend does not extend as far as it deserves.  That is true in both areas where his music has been heard and the fact that he died way before his time on May 29, 1995.  Murphy was the lead singer of the band zachariah.  The orginal incarnation of the band included Steve French as the drummer.  Steve is the drummer for Billy Ray Cyrus in Billy Ray's band Sly Dog.  The last lineup in the band included another local musician who died way too young: drummer Scott Simms.
Sadly there is not enough information available online to continue the legend of Mike Murphy so I am writing this blog as a tribute.  There is a website that isn't listed on any search engines and therefore does not receive as much traffic as it deserves, it is at http://gregoryhook.tripod.com/   Unfornately, there isn't even a myspace page dedicated to him.  His music is out of print and has been for years.  There isn't anyway to purchase it or even hear  it.  Alligator Jackson has recorded a tribute to Mike Murphy by recording his song "Ol' Cheap Wine."  The acoustic version which I perfer because it is more haunting, is number 2 on the music player.  A complete version with electric guitar and piano as well as other instruments is on number 5.  Dave Scarboro does the vocals.  "Ol' Cheap Wine" is the gator's favorite Murphy song although his most noterious is "Appalacian Lady" which receives an extreme amount of local airplay and was recorded by Cash (featuring Steve French on vocals), Billy Ray Cyrus (though it's never been offically released), South of Heaven Band, and Larry Pancake.  "Never Thought I'd Fall in Love With You" was recorded and released on Billy ray Cyrus's historic debuted album "Some Gave All" which holds Billboards record for most weeks at number one by a debut artist.  "Broken Man" is another song which you can hear covered on a regular basis by many local bands at local bars.  South of Heaven Band recorded this as well.  This is another legendary song that many outside of the tri-state will never hear.  "Ol' Cheap Wine" was recorded excellently by Kenny Joe Johnson and the Kentucky Rain for a tribute cd that was released to benefit Murphy's family soon after his death.  Unfornately, there isn't anyway to obtain this fine recording that is long out of print.

It is Alligator Jackson's hope that the words and music of James Michael Murphy live on forever.  Maybe the orginal tunes will be released sometime on cd or on itunes or some other downloading retailer.  Maybe more artists will record the music of Mr Murphy and these songs will get the recognition they have long deserved.  Thanks Mike Murphy for sharing these great lyrics with us.

Ol' CHEAP WINE by James Michael Murphy
Published by Creek Bank Publishing (BMI)

It's hurtin' to say what I'm feeling
It's tearin' me apart
I know when I tell you what's deep inside
It's gonna break your heart
Baby it's just no good any more
It's a thing we never should have started
My ship's coming in and I'll be leavin'
I'll be waitin' for it on the dock
It's been a long time since you asked me
to sing a song for you
well I guess all the years I've been out on the road
have kind of torn us both in two
Baby we're just like strangers now
It feels strange when I'm with you
Cause your lips are warm but your hearts so cold
There's only one thing left to do

CHORUS
So will you cry for me when I'm gone
Or will you party all night long
Will you drink from the bottle of ol' cheap wine
and think about this song
I bet you do I bet you do

BRIDGE
Well, known' you, you'll pass me off
and say just let him be
But I've found another
that wants to be my lover
and she sure is good to me
she sure is good to me
Please don't think 'cause I'm leaving
That I'm blamin' it all on you
It's just that all these years of tryin' to make a livin'
It's amazing what the years can do
Well I know you're thinking 'bout the years you lost
But baby I lost some too
It ain't nobody's fault it just didn't work out
You need to find somebody new

REPEAT CHORUS

Ya know when the Gator goes clubbin'!  He knows that's not his last stop of the evening.  Beer does somethin' to the ol' gator and makes him want to do one of two things!  Well, ya might guess what the first one is, since that's the reason most people go out, but the second one is eat.  Now, that don't make alot of sense really, because you would think the more beer one puts into his stomach the less room for food.  But this ol' gator gets hungrier the more he drinks.  So naturally, the night ain't endin' at a club!  The last call at the bar means time to beat the crowd to the resturaunt!  Ah, food!!!  Beer food!  Nice greasy slimy food that you normally wouldn't eat when you're sober!  But when you're drinking it sounds like pure heaven!  You'd never think that beer and eggs would mix but walk into a Waffle House at 4AM and some big ol' boy will be piledrivin' some eggs.  Or even more amazin', some lil' 100 pound chick will be eatin' her weight in nice greasy, alcohol absorbin' drunk food!

      Huntington used to have a place a few years ago called Dwight's that ruled the drunk food scene.  It'd be a regular freak show at 4AM.  You'd see things you didn't know exist.  you'd see that girl you tried to pick up earlier with some big ol' redneck!  You'd see lawyers, bagladies, strippers, and just about everyone of all walks of life.  All sittin' there splashing greasy full down into their beer logged tummies!  They'd even have cops working as guards to keep the drunks in line!  no problem though, cause at 4AM, there ain't no pool games and they're not even interested in women.  It's serious bizness - CHOW TIME!!
Well, Dwights bit the dust because, the night time was the only time people would eat their food.  I mean who wants that stuff when they're sober!
Taco Bell at $AM would be a good place fer a road block.  I mean if cops want to catch DUI's they should give ya a breathalizer when you pull up to the window because drunks love Taco Bell at 4AM.  It's classic beer food.
     The gator loves road trip beer food.  I mean what trip to Cincinnati to watch football or baseball is complete without a trip to Gold Star Chili or Skyline Chili.  I mean, chili and beer!!!  Wooooo!  Why hasn't the rest of the world caught on to this yet?  I mean every college campus in the country should have plenty of chili houses for their drunken students!
Speaking of Cincy!  Ya gotta have White Castles.  The slyders.  Yeah, they do slide through yer system but that's the next day and it flush's the alcohol out of ya!  Kind of like a radiator flush!  White Castles are only found in places like Cincy, Columbus, Louisville, and St Louis.  The frozen ones aren't the same.  There's something they about the ultra white resturaunt that just quinches a beer hunger!  something that ain't the same as a microwaveable lil' burger!  But, fresh from White Castle!  Them lil' burgers go down by the dozen!
Now, gator was out on the coast last year and In and Out Burgers are pretty good.  They're different then most beer food because they actually taste good in the day time when you're sober!  Their so good Paris Hilton got a dui in a hurry to get her some and you can tell she don't eat very often so they must be good.  Well, she drinks alot so that skewers that theory!
But take it from Alligator Jackson, the best time to chomp on greasy food is when ya have alot of beer that needs sponged up!!  Chomp On!!!!

THE STRIP BAR SONG (PUT OT BACK ON)

What is it with guys and strip bars.  Beer and titties, yes, I understand the attraction.  A good set of knockers, yes, even without the beer YES!!!  Some of the girls I've seen at Strip Bars.....uh....no....I think I'll pass.
Now, a good classy strip bar in Atlanta or New york....yep...I'd be speechless.
But a West Virginia strip bar.  I mean guys pay for this.  I understand that the ladies may need a supplement to their welfare checks.  But some of theese chicks....whew!!  I thought the gator would never say tat about titties.  But face it, they ain't all good and some of the ones in the local strip bars around here.  I just don't know.  Maybe that's how the bars make money: "we'll put a nasty chick up there and they'll drink extra more to make it look better!"  Maybe the cops bait the drunks :  "We'll put that fat chick up there and whoever applauds is drunk and we'll wait and see if they're driving!"  
Nothing says male bonding like going to a strip bar.  I mean, it's the ultimate guy night out.  But think about it: you're paying 10 bucks to get in and about 5 bucks a beer and then some big ol' guy with pizza sauce dripping over her mouth comes out and shakes the bar up literally by bouncing around on stage.  I mean some girls, when ya see them comin', take a big swig of beer 'cause when they start dancin', that cup will runneth over!!  And if they're going for the pole....oh no!! not a pole dance!!  Just hope the poles not holdin' the place up!!!  
And just as bad as Naked Nelly dancin' is the meth head!!  These are the girls ya want to tip 'cause ya think they're starving.  They dance too fast and a rib breaks through the skin.  It's not because they're spending the tip money at the Y, no, they're spending at Billy Bob's trailer by some of ol' Billy Bob's fresh batch of meth.  
Now don't get ol' AJ wrong, the gator loves big women, he just don't think they should be parading around in public without their clothes on.  As far as the junkie skinny look, these strippers need to put the crack pipe down and pick up a cheeseburger.
No matter who yer with, one of the guys thinks he's gettin' laid.  The fun part of the evening is getting that guy drunk.  ya know, that's what friends do... get their buddies drunk and then say yep, "I think ya got a chance".  Then watch him pull out his credit card and blow his money all night.  The thing of it is, he needs to learn that.  That's a valuable lesson.  Rather he gets the girl or not, if he doesn't, he'll know he's been hustled.  If he does even better, then he'll know it certainly wasn't worth it.  You see, the funny thing about strip bars.  The guys think they're in charge because they're looking at titties and of course, the girl winks at them and she naturally wants him.  The girls think they are in charge because they are seperating the fool from his money.  This gator thinks he'll just find a nice bar with cheaper beer, no cover charge, and a cool female bartender that keeps her clothes on.  Gator loves titties but not ones that everyone has seen.    If everyone's seen them then thar's nuthin' to brag about!!!

New Strip Bar cartoon and the tune "Strip Bar song (Put It Back On) is up on the player and up for free download on the home page.

THE STRIP BAR SONG (PUT IT BACK ON)

Me and the boys were heading out
soon as Paul got in the car
he started screaming his head off
wanting to go a strip bar
now just between you and me
that's what we wanted to hear
because I know me and the fellas
have nuttin' against tiities and beer

so we drank a few rounds at Jakes
then we went to the Fox's Den
we started screaming "take it off" as soon as we stumbled in
then this big ol' stripper got on stage
and started taking off her shirt
big ol' boobies flying everywhere
I was afraid someone'd get hurt

CHORUS: 
we started yelling
Put it back on please put it back on
I love naked women but this is just wrong
put it back on
please cover your belly
your dancing and prancin' 
has you shaking like a bowl of jelly
please put it back on
we all began to holler
put it back on and the whole bar'll give ya a dollar
please put it back on


it was gettin' pretty darn scary
I was beginning to fear
that there was a pretty good chance
that I'd throw up all of my beer

I looked at the big ol' bouncer
all he could do was agree
this ol' girl needed a gym membership
it was plain for everyone to see

CHORUS:
we started yelling
Put it back on please put it back on
I love naked women but this is just wrong
put it back on
please cover your belly
your dancing and prancin'
has you shaking like a bowl of jelly
please put it back on
we all began to holler
put it back on and the whole bar'll give ya a dollar
please put it back on


I looked at them titties
all I could see
two big ol' missles heading right at me
one swung from the left
one swung from the right
when they hit from both sides 
I was out like a light

CHORUS:
we started yelling
Put it back on please put it back on
I love naked women but this is just wrong
put it back on
please cover your belly
your dancing and prancin'
has you shaking like a bowl of jelly
please put it back on
we all began to holler
put it back on and the whole bar'll give ya a dollar
please put it back on

Ahhhhhh, it's finally Saturday mornin'.  Gator's travelled 1500 miles this week, up at the crack of dawn.  so it's cool to sleep into 8AM and sit back and rest this sore tooth the gator has.  It's hard to chomp on with a sore chomper!
It's great to be back home and have been thinkin' about how the tri-state has influenced Alligator Jackson.  West Virgina and Kentucky are always at the bottom of all the good lists and at the top of all the wrong lists.  But musically.....whew!!!  What a history.  So AJ is raisin' a Crocweiser to all of the great music that has come and is coming out of this area.
Gator's writer David Williams is from a railroad family that came from St Louis but David was born in Cincinnati in Pete Rose's rookie season and lived in Cumberland before settling in the Huntington suburb of Proctorville, Ohio in the bicential year of '76.

One of the first people David met was Jeff Westlake.  We discovered alot of great music together.  I remember Jeff getting his first guitar.  Jeff is now doing great as the lead guitarist of Hydrogyn www.hydrogyn.com  I remembering seeing my first concert Molly Hatchet in Huntington with Jeff on the Flirting With disaster tour (AJ's music is heavily influenced by Hatchet) and seein' Dio in Charleston with Jeff in the early 80's (Jeff has an ex-Dio guitarist Craig Goldy in his band now.)

I remember goin' to Davidson's Records and buying 45's of rock bands, going to the old Opus One and buying albums I never heard of before because I liked the covers.  I saved my lunch and money and I remember buying the first Iron Maiden album because the cover was cool.  I remeber going to the old Sights N Sounds and Gary playing import cds that I'd never heard of like Saxon and Motorhead and I'd like them and buy them.  I remeber buying an underground album that Gary got from the West Coast that no  one had heard of.  Ot was on Leather Records and was called Too Fast For Love by a band called Motley Crue.

When I was 18, I started working for Big Bear in Huntington.  A co-worker Etta French's husband Steve played in a band called Zachariah.  Back then 18 was the legal drinking age so I used to go watch them play.  You can check them out here http://gregoryhook.tripod.com/   Steve went on to play in excellent bands VHF (used to watch them at Bojangles), Cash (used to play at Ragtime, and has done 2 stints in Billy Ray's Band Sly Dog.
But zachariah was special.  Mike Murphy is the tri-state areas own special secret.  He is a legend here and his song "Old Cheap Wine" is a tri-state legend.  It is still played in many local bars by local cover bands as is "Broken Man."  Murph died tragically in the late 90's.  His songs are classics in this area but are not known outside of our borders.  Broken Man has been well done by The South of Heaven Band.  Die hard indie southern rock bands may be familar with that and their cover of Murphy's "applacian Lady" which was also covered by Cash and Billy Ray has done a rare version.  I was hoping if anyone reading this has an mp3 of Billy ray's applacian Woman or Kenny Joe Johnson and the Kentucky Rains version of Old Cheap Wine if they could email it to the gator at dwtrends@zoominternet.net  or daw7859@yahoo.com 

In the late 80's I worked on the night crew at Big Bear.  some of my co-workers (one of them being Repo Man) and I would get off work on Saturday around midnight and head down to the old Ragtime Lounge.  I would go there on my nights off as well to see a local newcomer.  A new guy from Flatwoods named Billy ray Cyrus played there for years and I watched him in the late 80's.  He filled the house with women!  But I enjoyed his music.  He loved Lynyrd Skynyd.  He'd come up to my table and would always say "Wanna hear some skynyrd?  I'll play ya some Skynyrd."  He did a great version of Billy Idol's Rebel Yell.  Best I ever heard.  You could tell he was gonna be big.  I miss hearing the classics that he sang ever week but never recorded.  There was the tri-state classic "It Ain't Over Until It's Over".  I bought 3 different girls at 3 diff times that single 45 and never kept one for myself.  WTCR used to play itt.  I haven't heard it in about 15-20 years.  I'd love to have that mp3 but doubt if it's around.
I miss hearing Babysitter, Remember, the orginal version of Should i stay or Go, and an alternate version of Applacian Lady.  These songs are lost in time because he never released them.  I remember being at the Paramount Theatre for the filming of Achy Breaky Heart video.  It took over 20 takes.  There is a brief glimpse of gator's back as the video comes on, lol!

Meanwhile, I also seen great music at bojangles and Rockers.  I used to like a band from Cleveland called Warchylde and even came up with a copy of their old 80's album not to long which someone transferred onto cd for me.
AJ always liked indie music.  I remeber buying a 45 from a band called Menlo Park in the 80's.  It was called "Wrong side of the Gun."  I was very surprised to find out recently that the man who reprduces my cds Mike fitazpatrick was in that band.  Mike owns Record/Play.  A great service that does the graphics for free on the cds he reproduces  www.recordplaycd.com.  Mike is in the tro-state legendary band The Return currently and they are working on a new cd!
Through the years this area was putting out hits.  i may forget them all but local legends include The Judds, Ricky Skaggs, Rebecca Lynn howard, Keith Whitely, Billy Ray Cyrus, Loretta Lynn.  Route 23 in Kentucky is known as Country Music Highway.
The great music keeps coming.  America Minor, Bobaflex, Hydrogyn have had international success.  Black Stone Cherry is a little farther up the road but they have had some success.  I remember in the 90's some dude from Detroit was coming down here and playing regularly.  No one heard of him but he played at several local clubs and was a regular on the scene.  His performing name was Kid Rock.
Not related to the tri-state but I remeber in the early 90's bragging to my mom and dad about how great Billy Ray is and how big he was going to be and that he was signed to Mercury Records.  They said that my cousin Scott was going to release a cd.  I was like really.  I wasn't impressed.  Scott was my second cousin, my Uncle' Rip's grandson.  I met him only a couple of times when we visited his family in Chagrin Falls near Cleveland and stayed with them a few days.  He was a Dennis the Menace type kid and I couldn't imagine him being a singer.  He was in California living and his band Mighty Joe young was recording a cd.  I mean there was no way he could be bigger than Billy Ray.  Nope, I assured mom and dad that it was great that little cousin Scott was singin' but I'm sure that he'd never top Billy Ray.
Well, BRC's debut cd set records that still haven't been broken.  He sold well pver 10 million records worldwide.  His album still holds Billboard's record for most weeks at number one by a debut artist.  I'm not sure but I think it was 15.  I'm still a billy Ray fan though I don't understand why a lot of the Tri-State kind of turned against him.
Lil' cousin Scott?  Due to the fact that an old blues singer had the name mighty Joe young copywrited they changed their name to Stone temple Pilots.  Though, my cousin, Scott weiland now sings with a band named Velvet Revolver.
The music still pours out of this area:  Swamp Jeuce, Zero King, and Threefold Theory.  ThreeFold Theory's singer Scott Niles sang with Jeff westlake's band Westlake and created some songs that I think are Tri-State classics.  Blind became a worldwide loved tune for Hydrogyn.  Chasing The Ghost and Bring You Down belong in a tri-state Hall of Fame.
Split Nixon is another band that may hit the big time.  And of course, Suffer.  Hopefully Suffer will release their cd soon.  It would be a great tribute to the memory of fallen guitarist aaron Roe.  It's an excellent cd.
Ricky Huckaby has a great new country cd avaiable.  WTCR features the Homegrown with Gary and Sonya Show Sunday nights at 5.  It can be heard online as well as locally on FM radio.  They play great new artists like sonya Crites, Red Neck Beach Bum, some of the all-time local greats, and a lil' band known as Alligator Jackson.

One of my all-time favorites Gary Jeffries used to live in California.  He recorded with Southern California hair band Asphalt Ballet in the 90's and recorded with Alligator Stew.  He is now living a little up river near Dayton , Ohio and is recording a cd which will be a southern classic www.myspace.com/garyjeffries  Also in Dayton, Ohio.  Scott hisey www.scotthisey.com has put out 3 excellent indie country cds with a sound that recalls Keith Whitely.  Scott has been on the verge of making it big for years, let's hope this is the year.
Also, down the road in Columbus is American Dog.  They have a classic rock cd called Hard which features one of my favorites "Sometimes you Eat The Pussy Sometimes The Pussy eats You".  They sound a lot like Columbus Ohio legends the Godz.  One of the world's most underated bands ever.  They were on Casablanca Records in the 70's (the label Kiss made famous).

Yep, sometimes this area doesn't get a lot of respect.  But when it comes to music, we can hold our own with anyone.  CHOMP ON TRISTATE, MAY YOU FOREVER CHOMP!!!!!

Here's a list of Gator's Local Classics to check out, one song per artist, limited to Huntington and it's surrounding areas. Apologies to anyone I'm not familiar with, this is just my favs. Some good ones to check out though.
NOT IN ORDER

Blind by Hydrogyn
Bring Me Down by Westlake
Radio Flyer by Split Nixon
Monster by Stone Budha
Ol Cheap Wine by James Michael Murphy and Zachariah
Not Enough Whiskey by South of Heaven Band
Ol Cheap Wine by Kenny Joe johnson and the Kentucky Rain
It's Not Over Until It's Over by Billy Ray Cyrus
Seven Years of Sundays - Cash
Liquid Courage - Alligator Jackson
The Letting Go - Threefold Theory
X19 Space Modulator - Heavy Me
These Are the Jobs - The Return
Mash The Gas - Ricky Huckaby
Beaches, Blondes, Bikinis, Beers, and Rednecks - Redneck Beach Bum
Cowgirls - Sonya Crites
Down and Out - Roger Clay
Wrapped Up In You - down in Flames
Walk On - American Minor
Better Than Me - Bobaflex
Hand on the Bottle - Swamp Jeuce
Drugs Will Keep Us Together - Zeroking
Make Your Peace - War Creek Mafia
Wild Country - Kanyon
New Machine - Aaron Miller Band
Angels in The Snow - Chum
Crush - Gran Pappy's Lap
Bitter truth - Stone Ka-Tet
Death Burn - The Ghosts of Now
Borderline - Suffer

 

Offical Alligator Jackson Cartoons.  The first 4 are by  Shane O' Shaughnessy, the next 3 are by Theresa McKracken at www.mchumor.com and the rest are by Doug Lawerence.  Feel free to post on your web page or myspace page but it'd be cool to include the artist name.